Posted by Allison as Celebrity Babies, Scientology, Tom Cruise- Only a Matter of Time Before He Kills Me at 1:00 PM UTC on Jul, 12 2006
The Hollywood couple feel the pressure of the media to release photographs of the 12-week-oldÂ girl,Â but will release photos of the invisible baby when they feel goodÂ & ready.
We are all becoming more suspicious by theÂ day & with the not-really-standard birth certificate obtained by TMZ.com,Â our heads are hurting from all the scratching & wondering.Â Â
Even US Weekly, in their oh-so-cute fashion, have a clock ticking off the days since Suri’s birth on April 18 to indicate how thisÂ child probably doesn’t exist or looksÂ justÂ like L. Ron Hubbard & the Church of Scientology is scared stiff to release those images to the public atÂ large.Â Â
Cruise & Holmes’ spokesperson Arnold RobinsonÂ recently stated,Â ”If and when they do make a decision, it will be at their discretion and not anybody else’s.”
Which really means to me that the child does have a bifurcated tail & horns.
Defamer:Â Snakes on a Plane, the music video
Posted by Allison as Career Moves at 8:52 AM UTC on Jul, 12 2006
BesidesÂ being the skinniest thing to hit London since Kate Moss, KeiraÂ Knightley isÂ apparently an emotional wreck.Â The Pirates of the Caribbean star has no idea why her boyfriend, co-star Rupert Friend,Â puts up with her & her out-of-control emotions, I have a few speculations on that subject…
Knightley tells Elle magazine, “I’m awful. I always have freak-outs. I don’t know why anyone puts up with me. I’m mostly an emotional wreck!”
She says even the smallest problems cause an emotional reaction: “It’s stupid s**t. I don’t freak out about anything that actually warrants a freak-out.
“That I can deal with. It’s the little stuff I can’t deal with.
“Anyone who has gone out with me will tell you I have this awful tendency to cry when I get really angry. And I can’t stop.
“If I could stop it I would, because I can occasionally come up with some fantastically cutting one-liners in fights.
“I’ll come out with one and say, ‘Oh, that was great.’ But suddenly I’ll find I’m crying. And I’ll be like, ‘S**t, I completely ruined my one-liner.’ It’s annoying!”
Well, I guess I feel that this behavior is pretty much par for the course of an actor.Â Any other ideas?
Posted by Allison as Mischief & Mayhem at 1:00 PM UTC on Jul, 11 2006
In a wish-I-could-have-been-there event, Jackie Chan rushed the stage of a Hong Kong concert while intoxicated.
Action star ChanÂ was invited to attend the performance of Taiwanese singer Jonathan LeeÂ this past Sunday in his native Hong KongÂ & apparentlyÂ thankedÂ everyoneÂ for the invite by crashing the show.
According to the Ming Pao Daily News, Jackie Chan unexpectedly took the stage & disrupted Lee’s performance while shouting insults at the crowd.Â The newspaper claims Chan told the audience that he was drunk & wished to sing a duet with Lee.Â
Chan also attempted to conduct the band, but was only able to start & stop them several times.Â
Hilarious, I say!Â I wonder if the real, drunk Jackie Chan is similar to the drunk Chan in Shanghai Noon, ’cause that would actually be quite adorable.Â Yep, definitely a wish-I-could-have-been-there event.
Defamer:Â Pirates 2 kicks more ass than the first
Posted by Allison as Career Moves at 9:13 AM UTC on Jul, 11 2006
Jolie will also join cast members Dustin Hoffman, Jackie Chan, Lucy Liu & Ian McShane for the martial arts cartoon movie scheduled to be released in May 2008, hope you’re strapped in for a wait.Â
Black will, of course, play Po the Panda who slings noodles in a restaurant & loves kung fu, but alas, does not have the right body to practice the marial art.
Jolie will provide the voice of Tigress, a martial arts master who must get the Po the Panda into fighting form after it is revealed that he is the Chosen One.
Don’t you just love movie news for movies that will come out in 2008?Â Anticipation is overrated, possibly the same principle goes for this movie.
Posted by Allison as For Appearances Sake at 9:12 AM UTC on Jul, 10 2006
I’m not making a stab at politics, but right-winger & political punditÂ Ann Coulter has a physical attribute that’s worth making fun of.
Beware the freakishly long monkey hands of Ann Coulter.Â They’re good for grabbing liberals by the neck & showing them the light, I suppose.Â Ye gods, they are frightening!
As US Weekly stated, I’m going to try & stifle my snicker next time she argues against the Theory of Evolution, gesturing lavishly with her monkey hands.
Apparently love overcomes age, or in this case, lust overcomes old man farts?Â 53-year-old actor Jeff Goldblum & 24-year-old Simple Life star Nicole Richie are dating.
Richie recently broke off her engagement with on & off again boyfriend / fiance DJ A.M., real name Adam Goldstein & is now enjoying the benefits of freedom by dating her childhood dreamboat, Goldblum.
The, if you will pardon my wording, hilarious coupleÂ have been spotted about in Hollywood lately & in a recent interview Richie stated that she’s had a crush on theÂ black-locked actor since she was 13.
Goldblum was at one time married to Geena Davis, how did he ever land her?, & was engaged to B movie star favorite Laura Dern.Â He was, until quite recently, engaged to another 24-year-old, a dancer by the name of Catherine Wreford.Â After a whirlwind romance, the couple engaged each other following a touring stage production of The Music Man.
Two words:Â gag & gross.
Egotastic:Â Kritsin Cavallari bikini pictures to make your day happy
Celebitchy:Â Avril Lavigne getting married this weekend?
Posted by Allison as Engagements & Weddings at 9:09 AM UTC on Jul, 06 2006
During a recent Mexican getaway, Jen & Vince could keep quiet no longer.Â Jen told a friend, “We’re getting married.”Â The big news came after their week their week between Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis’ Puerto Vallarta property & Cabo San Lucas where they spent some time holed up in their $5,000 per night suite at the Villas Del Mar at Palmilla.Â
An employee of the resort stated,Â â€œThey didnâ€™t leave the resort too often.Â She was a very quiet guest.â€
To celebrate their last night in MexicoÂ last Sunday,Â Aniston & VaughnÂ they ordered in appetizers from restaurant. â€œ
They seemed in love,â€Â said another resort employee.
Pal Courteney Cox thinks the duo make a nice pair & might make it through a marriage.
â€œHe makes her laugh.â€Â Cox stated.Â â€œThey have fun, Iâ€™ll say that much.Â They’ll spend a lot of time laughing.â€
Posted by Allison as Conscience & Morality Tales at 1:00 PM UTC on Jul, 05 2006
Lohan has become so involved with the mystical Jewish beleif system Kabbalah, she has been given a name to signify her involvement.Â Her special name is Rose.Â Makes sense, they are pretty but that whole damn thorn thing can be a problem.Â According to reports, Lohan’s name “is partly based on her birth date and place of birth.”
Madonna has been rumored to have been mentoring Lohan, after the Britney Spears fiasco, and introducing her to the mystical (and financial) ways of the religion.Â Lohan has stated that she finds solace from her hectic life & partying waysÂ in Kabbalah.
Madonna’s special name is Esther.Â Dammit, I want a special name!
Celebitchy:Â Hilary Swank says ex-love Chad Lowe is an addict- well, duh!
IDLYITW:Â Freddie Prinze Jr. really is a prankster
Pink is the New Blog:Â Tori Amos working her magic in the recordingÂ studio
Gawker:Â Lil’ Kim out of prison & not so lil’ after all
Defamer:Â Â Meryl Streep saves summer 2006
Posted by Allison as Celebrity Babies, Scientology, Tom Cruise- Only a Matter of Time Before He Kills Me at 9:42 AM UTC on Jul, 05 2006
Even good pals & fellow scientologists John Travolta, Kelly Preston or Lisa Marie Presley have yet to see the young tyke.Â According to a source, friends Will & Jada Pinkett Smith have not seen the fruit of Cruise’s loins, despite many a call to the Crusie / Holmes household.
The source states, â€œEvery time, itâ€™s a different excuse: Heâ€™s busy or Kateâ€™s not feeling well.Â [The Smiths] think itâ€™s so weird.â€
Right after Suri was born, the photoÂ agency WireImage stated that it would be offeringÂ photographs of Suri for auction.Â Just days later, on May 11, the photo agencyÂ declared, “the baby shoot is on hold for now. There is no additional info as to when this may happen or if it will even happen at all.”
I’m still convinced we haven’t seen the girl child Suri because she has red horns on her head & a bifurcated tail.Â
Posted by Allison as Mischief & Mayhem at 1:00 PM UTC on Jul, 03 2006
Crazypants Naomi Campbell needs psychological help, according toÂ her formerÂ personalÂ assistant Ana Scolavino.Â Ummm, I could have told you that much.Â Crazypants Campbell is what I call the superfreak,Â I mean, the supermodel.Â
ButÂ I guess ScolavionÂ has fist-handed experience with Naomi, since she was attacked byÂ herÂ earlier this year with a phone to the head, whichÂ ended up needing several stitches.
Last Tuesday Campbell pleadedÂ not guilty to assaulting Scolavino inÂ her New Tork home inÂ March.Â Yeah, right.Â Â Â The case has been adjourned until Septebmer 27, giving, I’m sure, Campbell enough time to bribe (and / or sleep with) all the right people.
Scolavino has been so appalled with Crazypants Campbell’s behavior, she likened it to “a wild, caged animal ready to pounce on any victim.”
The former assistant went on to say, “She is so crazy you never know when she will hit out. Anything can send her into a frenzy.
“There is not a single nice bone in Naomi’s body. She is a psychotic monster.
“On the catwalk she might look beautiful, but apart from her face in person she is the ugliest person I have ever met.
“She needs serious psychological help before she hurts or even kills someone. I should know–I am lucky to be alive.
“Every day she was like a wild, caged animal ready to pounce on any victim, swearing at everyone.”
And Crazypants Campbell strikes again, literally.
Celebitchy:Â Uma Thurman hits the beach with hotelier boyfriend
The Superficial:Â Hooray for independence!
Jossip:Â Lil’ Kim gets another chance
D Listed:Â Tara Reid still colorful
Posted by Allison as Paris Hilton Needs Her Own Category at 9:00 AM UTC on Jul, 03 2006
The actress / singer / all-around hooligan decided that her personal safety was at risk after the man arrived at Rick Hilton’s place of business.Â Â
She says, “I’ve had a lot of stalker incidents, and I usually can handle them.
“But the scariest one was when a guy turned up at my dad’s office and said he was my fiance. He forced his way inside and the cops discovered he had a knife on him. That was freaky.
“Now I have a lot of security all the time so I feel safe. I guess that’s one of the things you have to learn to live with, but it’s still scary.”
Poor Paris.Â She just wants to feel safe.Â
It’s a bird.Â It’s a plane.Â No, it’s the box office soaring faster than a speeding bullet this weekend with Superman Returns as its prime breadwinner.Â The much awaited movie hits screens with 4,065 engagements this weekend.
The Warner Bros.Â Pictures film sped into 3,915 venues in North America Wednesday & cashed in more than $21 million inÂ gross ticket sales.Â Â The Wednesday premier was number 11 on the biggest Wednesday opening, of all time, just behind The Fellowship of the Ring which took in $18.2 million, with Spider-Man 2 taking the cake in 2004 with $40.4 million.
Superman Returns marks the first time in 19 years that the blue leotard-ed man has graced the silver screen.Â With newcomer Brandon Routh donning the red cape,Â blowing-away-in-the-wind Kate Bosworth as newsie Lois Lane & Kevin Spacey as villain Lex Luthor, this new take on an old take will be an interesting couple of hours.Â
See you bright & early Monday with more rumors & tales.Â Happy weekend!
Well, it looks like a butt-load of paparazzi photosÂ are comingÂ out of the St. Regis resort in Bora Bora.Â Nicole Kidman & new hubby Keith Urban privately jetted to Tahiti Monday for theirÂ honeymoon, only to find Eva Longoria & Tony Parker staying a few feet away.Â So much for privacy….Â
Pictures ofÂ theÂ Desperate Housewives star & her basketball lover have already surfaced along with honeymoon pics of the newlyweds Kidman & Urban.Â Â
Longoria & Parker’s commercial flight touched down just minutes after Kidman & Urban landed in the main port city on their private Gulfstream jet from Australia.
TheÂ severalÂ high-profile guests have sent the Bora Bora resort into a code-orange like security mode, with staff on jet skis patrolling the perimeter regularly.Â
Nicole & Keith have preferred to keep tucked away in their bungalow, which isÂ equipped with a Jacuzzi & private pool while Eva & TonyÂ have spent their time cruising around the island via golf carts.Â
What a life.Â I think I need to be whisked away to Bora Bora this weekend….