Performancing Metrics


Borat Braces for Drunken SC Frat Boys Lawsuit

borat-fraternity-boys-lawsuit-11-10-2006.jpgIt looks like Borat’s luck may be running out as two fraternity brothers are filing a lawsuit against the comedian over their drunken spot in the new hit movie.  So, don’t they make you sign some kind of release form to avoid situations like this? 

On Thursday legal action was taken against Borat & his spoof documentary Borat:  Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan.  The lawsuit states that the two college kids “engaged in behavior that they otherwise would not have engaged in.” 

The plaintiffs that filed the suit have not been named “to protect themselves from any additional and unnecessary embarrassment.”

The two were identified in the movie as frat brothers from a South Carolina university where they were shown making insulting comments about women & minorities.  Ouch!  Yeah, I guess they pulled a Mel Gibson move & regretted their actions the next morning, or while South Carolina minorities & women were beating the crap out of them after seeing the movie.  Maybe I’m a little rash, but the peckers deserve what they get.  What do you think?


faith-hill-carrie-underwood-jealous-cma-11-10-2006.jpgWow, this whole Faith Hill reaction to Carrie Underwood winning the Female Vocalist of the Year award at the CMAs has caused quite a ruckus!  Who knew that we paid so much attention to Hill’s reactions?

Here’s the story, in case you’re living under a pile of very heavy rocks.   When Carrie Underwood was announced as the Female Vocalist of the Year award winner Monday, Faith Hill was spotted on camera screaming “What??!!”  [See video here]

So folks have been upset with Hill & her possible jealously for the new, younger star.  But Nashville’s stars are coming to the defense of the veteran country star.

Close pal Martina McBride told the Tennessean that Hill was “just clowning around.

Kenny Chesney also came to Hill’s rescue, saying that he has known Faith for more than a decade, and that she doesn’t have a malicious or jealous bone in her body.

Interestingly, both Hill & Underwood are nominated for Best Female Vocalist in the People’s Choice Awards, to be held January 9.  Well, that should be fun.  Maybe they’ll come up with a cute skit about this one.


Ed Bradley Dies of Leukemia, Remembering a Great Journalist

ed-bradley-death-11-10-2006.jpgTrailblazing pioneer journalist Ed Bradley died of leukemia Thursday.  The forward-thinking 65-year-old correspondent had a long career working with CBS, reporting for the news agency since 1967. 

Bradley’s inquisitive nature, his trademark earring & his resiliant spirit all made the man a tremendous reporter and added vitality to news reporting once again.

“We have lost one of America’s best,” Dan Rather stated.

“As a compassionate, sensitive person, he was an example of all a conscientious and dedicated journalist can be.”  -but rarely are.

He will be sorely missed.  So long, Ed, you did good.

Bradley is survived by his artist wife Patricia Blanchet, whom he married in 2004. 



shar-jackson-says-kevin-federline-is-a-nice-guy-11-10-2006.jpgActress & ex-girlfriend of Kevin Federline, 30-year-old Shar Jackson, has finally spoken out about her feelings regarding K-Fed & Britney Spears’ divorce.  Jackson is the mother of two of K-Fed’s children, 4-year-old Kori & 2-year-old Kaleb.  You’ll notice the age of the latter is just about as long as Federline & Spears have been an item.  Yeah, that’ll be because Kevin left a very pregnant Shar Jackson for a lovely & available Spears.  How classy.

“I hope that they are mature enough to realize that their differences come second to the needs of their children and that it is no longer about them as individuals, but about maintaining a healthy friendship/relationship for the sake of their children,” Jackson revealed.

Shar recently stated that she saw no ill signs between Kevin & Brit the last time she saw them together at K-Fed’s Halloween album release party.

“They seemed happy to me,” Shar said. “[Britney] gave me a hug…and told me I looked cute.”

Jackson was pretty classy about the whole thing, and color me impressed.  Shar said she has no bitter feelings toward Federline for leaving her for Spears, in fact she feels pity for the poor boy.

“He’s such a nice guy.  He’s made some mistakes but everybody else doesn’t have the whole world pointing their finger at their mistakes.”

As reported earlier both Federline & Spears are suing for custody of their two sons Sean Preston & Jayden James.
“I don’t know what their situation is or why he wants to get custody of his children other than the fact that he loves them,” Jackson went on to say.

“Maybe, it goes deeper than that. Maybe it’s because of all the press about her mothering.”

When questioned on why the public seems to be reveling in the couple’s break-up, Shar responded by saying, “I think part of it is because whether you know him or not, he has become almost a national joke.”

And never a more fitting expression was coined.


Sadly, Pamela Anderson & Kid Rock Have Miscarriage

pamela-anderson-kid-rock-miscarriage-11-10-06.jpgNews reports are out that 39-year-old Pamela Anderson & 35-year-old husband Kid Rock have suffered a miscarriage.  We were just listening to the rumors about Anderson’s supposed pregnancy, and we’re all sad for Pam & Kid’s loss.

A spokesperson for Anderson confirmed the miscarriage & stated that is happened late last week while filming Blonde & Blonder in Vancouver, Canada.  So, really, it makes more sense for Anderson to be throwing laptops off of hotel roofs & hitting innocent grandmas than crazyface Denise Richards. 

The rep for Pam went on to state, “Pamela’s privacy be respected at this time.”

A source close to Anderson & Kid Rock said the famous blonde was not too far along, that she was still in her first trimester.

“It is what it is.  It was early enough,” the source stated.

“She will keep trying. She really wants another baby with Bob,” the source went on to state.

Poor Pam, hopefully they will keep trying.





For some reason Paris Hilton & Nicole Richie love their video games so much, they try and shake a leg to celebrate their love.

Hilton & Richie were spotted Thursday as Hollywood hosted a “First Look” party to see the PLAYSTATION 3 in Beverly Hills.  I had no idea that the ladies felt so strongly about their games.  Who knew?

The Celebrific Lowdown


Celebitchy:  Why is Reese Witherspoon in Austin? 

Bastardly:   Sophie Monk, hot or not?

I’m Not Obsessed:  Ashlee Simpson & pals sport the little black dress 

Gossip or Truth:   Prison Break screencaps

Yeeeah:   Luke Wilson & Kate Beckinsdale hate each other, oddly enough

Glitterati Gossip:   More Nicole Kidman pregnancy rumors

Hollywood Tuna:  Lindsay Lohan gives Robbie Williams the snub, ha!


Denise Richards Takes Aggression Out on Elderly Women


Denise Richards has a bit of a problem with anger management, as indicated by an incident today (police on scene right now as of 2:30pm CST).

Here’s what’s goin’ on:  While on set in Vancouver, British Columbia where Richards & Pamela Anderson are filming Blonde and Blonder, Denise got into an argument with some paparazzi that were taking photographs of her.

Richards stormed up to the photographer’s hotel room & had some kind of crazy fit where she threw his laptop off the hotel balcony.  Reports state that as the helpless laptop was being thrown off the hotel balcony, an 80-year-old woman in a wheelchair received a blow to the arm as the poor little innocent laptop plummeted to the ground.  Oops.

Here’s the dish now from Lainey’s Gossip:

“The River Rock Casino where Denise and Pam are shooting Blonde and Blonder – huge drama, a small village of witnesses, police are on site RIGHT NOW (6:30pm PST)!!!

A couple of photographers are taking photos from a balcony overlooking the concourse where Denise was getting ready for her scene. She sees them, she storms up the stairs, a heated exchange ensues, she’s overheard cussing at them, an eye and ear witness tells me he heard the word “cocksucker”, they’re cussing back at her… and then!

And then!

She grabs one of their laptops and THROWS IT OVER THE BALCONY!!!

The laptop goes flying and it HITS AN OLDER LADY IN THE ARM!!!

This was observed by everyone on the set not to mention many, many casino patrons…

I was the only one to speak to the photographer involved in the incident tonight. Rik Fedyck is a freelance photographer in Vancouver.

He confirmed to me and to CTV news exclusively that Denise Richards stormed up the stairs at the River Rock Casino and Resort on Wednesday late afternoon and after a heated exchange, grabbed his laptop and threw it off the balcony.

He also told me that two elderly women were struck. According to Rik, one of the women was 91 years old.”

Wow, well I guess that does kinda sound like Denise Richards.  I can’t wait for the candids.  Poor, little old lady!  Hopefully she’ll sue!  I wouldn’t mind representing the poor laptop.



I thought we would check on the newly petitioning for divorce Britney Spears & Kevin Federline to see how they’re managing.  Brit had a fantabulous time the other night ice skating at Rockefeller, and it appears as if K-Fed is taking the text-message-news pretty well.

The welcome-back-to-sanity Spears was spotted Wednesday around 1am heading to a New York City music studio with her manager, who seems to be helping to manage to keep the poor girl on her feet.

While estranged husband Kevin Federline headed to Cabaret club in Chicago after his free, and highly unattended, rap show Wednesday at the House of Blues.  Onstage, K-Fed is quoted as saying, “You wanna dance with a pimp?”

Yep, that sounds like him.  I hope the crowd promptly vomited and walked out, but that’s just my silly, old dreamworld talking there.

Rosario Dawson & Jason Lewis Break-Up

rosario-dawson-jason-lewis-split-11-9-2006.jpgDamn this has been a week of break-ups & goodbyes, and today is no different.  News is in that Sin City actress Rosario Dawson & former Sex and the City star Jason Lewis have called it quits.  The two have been dating since November 2005 and have been living together in Hollywood.

“[Rosario] was telling people a few weeks ago that they’re over. She’s really upset,” a source revealed.

It’s so strange this is happening, as the happy couple were spotted only October 23 enjoying a very long hug outside a Los Angeles restaurant.  TMZ even commented on the extended hug, saying it was “one of the longest celebrity hugs ever caught by a paparazzo’s lens, it’s nice to see young actors so clearly nuts about each other.”

No word as of yet on why Dawson & Lewis have called off their relationship, although in March 2006 Dawson said that it is sometimes very difficult to handle all the attention her boyfriend receives from the ladies.
Dawson stated, “Every time we go to a party, Jason is soon surrounded by a group of women of all ages.  They openly put their hands all over him – even between his legs – and ask him out. I am sitting there alongside him, watching all this.”
“Even I have been surprised by their behavior. Yet I always think it is impossible to shock me.”
Reps for Rosario & Jason had no comment.  What a bleak relationship week this has been!





Kate Moss & beau / addict Pete Doherty were spotted Wednesday evening in London attending Vogue’s 90th Birthday Party.

At first I thought I would try to find a better picture of Moss & Doherty, where Pete was not covering up his face with his arms, but then I realized, of course, that this is probably the best way to see Pete.  What do you think?


Kevin Federline Wants His Day in Court, Counters Britney Spears

kevin-federline-divorce-petition-11-9-2006.jpgAll I have to say is this:  What more can you expect from Kevin “K-Fed” Federline?  Following estranged wife Britney Spears’ divorce petition Wednesday, Kevin Federline has quite quickly filed his own petition against the 24-year-old pop star.

28-year-old Federline & his lawyer Mark Kaplan filed a divorce petition in a Los Angeles Superior Court Wednesday, man that place was busy yesterday! 

What is K-Fed asking for?  Why, he’s asking exactly what Brit is asking for, what would you expect?  Kevin is asking for sole physical & legal custody of 1-year-old son Sean Preston & 8-week old son Jayden James.  He goes on to ask that the courts only award Spears visitation rights with her children and that she pay his attorney fees as well as spousal support.  Because K-Fed has gotten right used to the life Britney’s been providing him.

This is going to get really messy, and I mean Jerry Springer messy.  Let’s just hope they can keep their clothes on & their dignity around, although I fear this is a lot to ask.  I just hope that Britney’s prenuptial agreement as as rock-solid as they’re saying it is.  So glad you went with that prenup, Brit.  A smart move amidst a bunch of really bad ones.



reese-witherspoon-ryan-phillippe-divorce-11-9-2006.jpgWell, it that was fast, and hopefully the whole thing will be almost painless.  On Wednesday 30-year-old Reese Witherspoon filed for divorce from 30-year-old husband Ryan Phillippe.  I told you, it’s the end of an era.

Witherspoon filed for divorce in a Los Angeles Superior Court, citing “irreconcilable differences” as the reason for her application. 

What Reese is asking for:  Joint legal custody of 7-year-old daughter Ava and 3-year-old son Deacon, however Reese is asking for physical custody and is willing to grant Ryan visitation rights.  Witherspoon goes on to ask the courts to block any attempt by Phillippe to seek spousal support & asks for “exclusive use of the family residence.”  As the couple does not have a prenup, oops, the earning will be divided up 50/50.  What a damn shame for Reese.  A damn shame.

Witherspoon lists the date of separation as October 30 and signed the actual divorce papers on November 7.  Way to celebrate voting day, it looks like everyone is looking for a little change this year.  

Ahhhh, the end of an era, the end of innocence, the end of Reese & Ryan. 


kevin-federline-last-interview-before-divorce-11-8-2006.jpgThe night before pop star Britney Spears filed for divorce from estranged husband Kevin Federline, People caught up with the “rap” star in Toronto.  Here’s that interview now, I have taken the small liberty of adding my interpretation.

People: You’re on this huge promotional tour – and you’re alone. Is it to set yourself apart as an artist or because Britney is with the kids? [Are you sure you have the talent to go on tour?]

Kevin: Of course, and the kids are too little. I don’t want to bring the little one on the road, especially. There’s no pictures of him out there yet or anything like that so, I really try to keep them as safe as possible.  [Especially since Brit doesn't trust me around them.]

People:  You’ve said that you and Britney have a fiery relationship. What makes you guys work?  [How in the hell did you land Britney damn Spears, you imbecile?]

Kevin: She’s the spice and I’m kinda like the sweet in it. I’m the laid-back person. She’s always hyperactive and running around crazy and I don’t know, it just works. I calm her down and she speeds me up.  [Yeah, that's the weed talking, K-Fed.]

People:  So, would you say you’re misunderstood?  [You are completely & irresponsibly stupid.]

Kevin: Definitely, definitely. We are, we are. I mean, that’s the way it is. I don’t know why it’s that way, but that’s what they do to us. It’s all right. We don’t care cause we’re happy.  [I have no idea what you just asked me, dude.]

People:  Does she support you?  [How much is your allowance, Kevin?]

Kevin: She supports me. I support her. I mean, you know, it’s simple. It’s one word. And that word is love. And I got a lot of love for her.  [Britney gives me a lot of damn money, for sure.]

People:  Plus you guys have a new family.  [You were able to spread your seed with Ms. Spears, were you not, you big, lucky redneck retard?]

Kevin: That’s what I mean. We’re a family. It’s cool. It’s great.  [Yeah, she's a great bang, not as good as some, but still pretty tip-top.]

People:  Is it hard being away from them?  [Does Britney even come see you while you're on tour?]

Kevin: Man, it is hard. It’s hard. I mean, I’ve got a little bit of experience in it, you know, I’ve had to be away from my other kids, so having to do that I really know how it feels. When it gets to me I think about them and know I’ll be there soon.  [Child services sometimes takes the kids away from me, so I'm used to that, man.]

People:  Are they going to join you eventually?  [Are you able to be within 30 feet of your "family"?]

Kevin: Possibly. I’m not sure.  [The jury is still out on that, and I mean that all literal-like.]

People:  Are you in touch?  [With reality?]

Kevin: Of course. Well, she’s recording now too so that’s why it’s gonna be real hard. [To try & get my fine ass on that album with her.]

People:  Have you worked with Britney on her album? ][Has Spears let your untalented, skinny self anywhere close to her recording studio?]

Kevin: I haven’t done anything with her yet. There’s been talk about it but we’ll see what happens. [That bitch has yet to ask me to lay down tracks with her, she just doesn't recognize talent.]

People:  So, throughout all your crazy touring, you’re the laid-back one. Do you need Britney to pep you up?  [Are you getting all the sex you need from your misinformed groupies, you bastard?]

Kevin: Sometimes, not too much. I like being this way. It’s real hard to get me out of this element. If I was very high-strung, I probably would’ve knocked a few people out by now and you know, you would have seen a bad side of me that probably, hopefully I’ll never show.  [No, I’ve got all the “pep” you need, if that’s what you wanna call it, man.}

People:  Because you guys are so different, do you fight?  [Do you ever lay a hand on her, you monster?]

Kevin: Of course. We’re people, like, it’s like any relationship. We have our ups and downs and we work through everything that we possibly can. If we can’t work through it, we drop it and that’s where it stays.  [All the time, and sometimes two!]

People:  What would you say to critics who knock you guys? [What would you say to those who live a life in reality?]

Kevin: I’m happy. I don’t care what other people say or think. I’m happy. I’m blessed. I’m proud of my life and that’s it. That’s all that matters. [Hitler was once happy too.]

People:  So how does it feel to have a new baby, a new album, and more?  [Are you even able to look beyond yourself, you redneck?]

Kevin: I feel great. I feel like I’m on top of my game right now. I’m very, very involved in every aspect of my life right now and I’ll make sure I keep to it. [This is how we do it...]

People:  How’s your personal life?  [Have you received any text messages yet regarding a divorce from your wife Britney Spears?]

Kevin: We’re good. Like I said, we have our times and our spats and all that stuff, but other than that we’re good. It’s a lot of hard work, but we knew it was gonna be that way and we’re dealing with it day to day. [No, man, not yet.  Umm, why do you ask that question?]

People:  With lots of communication?  [Are you sure you know your marriage?  I feel there is a text coming any minute now...]

Kevin: All the time, all the time. It’s not like we fight or anything all the time. It’s just, you know, it gets tiring when you’re up all night with the kids and you gotta go to work the next day and me and her have to learn to find time for me and her.  [I gotta make time for me, yo.]

People:  Have you been doing that? [Have you been able to find your ass from a hole in the ground?  I hear monkeys can do that, can you, Kevin?]

Kevin: We haven’t been able to do it lately. I think that that’s part of the problem but we’ll be all right. We’ll be fine. I talk to her all the time. She can’t wait for me to get home. [I have no idea where Britney was last night, man.  Was she with you?]


Britney Spears & Kevin Federline Divorce: Saying Goodbye


Keith Urban Speaks About Addiction & Gives Advice


Keith Urban, who recently checked into an alcohol abuse rehabilitation center has some advice for those who struggle for addiction.  His advice is to communicate, communicate, communicate.

“Everyone gets overwhelmed at points, but it’s when you think you can handle it yourself and you don’t reach out for help. That’s when the end is near,” Urban revealed.

“Recognize that you are about the tire, that drowning is looming.”

“I’ve definitely been that drowning guy, and in the midst of drowning, I thought, `I wonder if I should put my hand up?’ … I’m just really grateful to be present and doing what I can. And if it overwhelms me, I speak out and say, `There is too much going on.”‘

Well, it looks like Keith knows what he’s doing, but at the same time I don’t blame wife Nicole Kidman for going ahead with that prenup.



Ryan Phillippe Admits That’s He’s Not Perfect


Ryan Phillippe has spoken out for the first time since the news hit about he & estrange wife Resse Witherspoon’s divorce.  Their divorce was announced October 30 and the boy finally has something to say.

“I’m not a perfect person, but I’m not guilty of a lot of the things I have been accused of. My priority is and always has been the health and safety of my family,” Phillippe revealed.

I guess health & safety have nothing to do with cheating on Reese with someone that is almost an exact ringer for the star.  What gives on that?

Ryan did not face the rumors & reports about his affair with co-star Abbie Cornish, but his reps did deny reports of hard partying & drug use.  Deny, deny, deny.  But I guess they didn’t want to touch that whole Abbie thing with a 10-foot pole, although Ryan seems to have several times. 

But, really isn’t this Abbie Cornish-hen chick a dead ringer for Reese?  Jeez, Ryan, try something different for a change.  How confusing, did he ever holler out “Reese, Reese!” when he was with her, I don’t see how you couldn’t.  What do you think?


OMG! Is Heath Ledger Going Bald?!


So, I think we can safely say why Heath Ledger insists on always being the homeless, beanie-wearing guy, he is definitely thinning!  Here is the young actor spotted Monday at a special screening of Candy at the Tribeca Grand Hotel in New York City.

This is so sad, he’s only enjoyed his blonde locks for 27 years.  Maybe Heath just has fine hair, but it really looks like it’s going to be Ron Howard bald-land for the legend Ledger.

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