First, if you expected me NOT to use that joke as the title then obviously we haven’t gotten to know each other very well over the past two weeks. Sometimes you are given names and they are like softball pitches with a beachball. If you don’t hit them out of the park, someone else will and do you know how it feels when someone else hits your beachball out of the park?
You probably don’t because you were the person hitting the beachballs. You are an evil person and the dear Morgan Fairchild will spite you when she sees you. You must understand that she was born before the Grand Canyon was formed and therefore knows secrets of the Earth that you didn’t know existed.
She is forever beautiful, but she wasn’t always like this. It was a fateful December night when our lips locked and the sap of youth was returned to her body. Yes, I am the reason she still looks beautiful. I am the Tinkerbell of this world and since you have hit my beachball I shall fly away never to return.
Eat that Peter Pan.