David Hasselhoff, hairy man extraordinaire at large, is firing back at claimsÂ from his estranged wife Pamela Hasselhoff that he was an abusive husband.Â Does this photo look like a man capable of spousal abuse, a man with demons inside just waiting for the appropriate irritation to let them loose on his victim?Â Maybe.Â Possibly.Â Even probably.
Pamela Hasselhoff has won a restraining order from a Los Angeles court after claiming in court documents that the Knight Rider “star” once screamed profanities at her in front of their children and slammed her into a car.Â You know, if that reallyÂ is the case- I’ve gotÂ plenty ofÂ neighbors who need restraining orders.
Ex-Baywatch “star” Hasselhoff denies these allegations saying thatÂ they are a figment of her imagination.Â Hmmm, I like that approach.Â I’m not really robbing your bank and taking this sack-full of cash, it’s just a figment of your imagination.Â Yeah, I like that.
Hasselhoff’s publicist stated, “David Hasselhoff categorically denies that he has engaged in the conduct alleged by his wife.Â Unfortunately, Mrs. Hasselhoff has personal issues that need to be addressed with the assistance of professionals.Â Out of the consideration for his children, which, as always, remains his paramount concern, he is not going to discuss this publicly.”
Damn, I need a publicist.Â I can just see the aftermath of my bank robbing adventures now, “Unfortunately, the bank has personal issues that need to be addressed with the assistance of professionals.Â Out of the consideration for the bank employees and her own children which, as always, remains her paramount concern, Allison is not going to discuss this publicly.”Â Smooth.
It’s Hasselhoff publicists warfare- Pamela’s publicist fires back with,Â “We question Mr. Hasselhoff’s statement about his wife requiring professional help. What does that mean? Professional help could mean an agent looking for a job for her. What he is trying to imply is something medical and that is a defamatory statement and we object to that. There has never been an allegation of this type made against Pamela in her career.”
A fabulous and again, smooth response- leaving me with more validation that I, myself could use a good publicist.Â They’re better than lawyers, these publicists,Â they are smooth & eloquent verbal fighters.Â I love it.Â Don’t fight your own petty battles, just hand them over to your personal publicist.Â “Allison would like to date your client, how does he feel about that?”Â “My client feels that dating said person would be a devastation to his career as a transvestite tight rope walker and declines the offer, but does appreciate her consideration.”