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Archive for the ‘Odds & Ends’ Category

Surfers scare away paparazzi

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Take that, you nosy reporters!

Surfers attacked paparazzi who were trying to get photos of a half-naked Matthew McConaughey. The actor was trying to unwind on the beach, where he often goes with his friends.



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Villains of TV

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Move over, Cruella de Ville. Check out the villains of reality TV. They were snarky, conniving, or downright self-obsessed — and boy, did we love to hate them!



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Martha’s mustache

Check out the behind the scenes clips of Martha Stewart’s “Got Milk?” ad. Apparently, she believes that low fat milk and healthy living is “A Good Thing.”



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Jackson family “broke”

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How the mighty have fallen. Most of the Jackson family is broke, and have gone from being pop sensations to…supermarket clerks. We won’t name names, but Who knew Motown would lead to skid row? Did you know that the majority of the Jackson family is broke and scrapping for cash.

Check out this sad list of the Jackson’s (nion) careers, from stocking supermarket shelves to judging beauty contests.

Even Michael Jackson, the former king of pop, has been reduced to hiding out in Las Vegas. He’ll soon be losing his Neverland Mansion — on top of the Jackson family home.

Tragic.



Did she just say that?

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Ellen Degeneres. You gotta love her.

The comedian sent Heidi Klum (and America) giggling hysterically during a cooking segment on her show.

“I don’t know much about balls,” she said.



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Ben Affleck’s new love

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Sarah Silverman may have got the first laugh when she made her music video “I’m f*ing Matt Damon. But her boyfriend Jimmy Kimmel has a comeback: “I’m F—ing Ben Affleck.” Will his video get the 4 million hits that Sarah’s received on You Tube alone?



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The (troubled?) tweens of TV

AOL came out with its top 20 list of hottest tween stars.

Interesting that list young, perky hopefuls, several have already gotten themselves into Hollywood trouble: nude photos circulated on the web, unwanted pregnancy, wild party pics, hooking up with co-stars just to further their careers.

Let’s bookmark that list, shall we, and check on them 10 years from now. Which ones of those adorable darlings will have DUI arrests, sex scandals and rehab history? Remember, Britne was a Mouseketeer.



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Stars reach out to the homeless

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Thank God some celebrities have better things to do with their time and money than date horrible men or buy ridiculously overpriced designer bags.

Harrison Ford and Calista Flockhart went downtown to serve turkey to the homeless, joined by Kirk Douglas and Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa.

Douglas said, “It’s inspiring to see actors and politicians come and help serve. It will help their souls as much as it helps the guests being served.”

Los Angeles has one of the United States’ highest population of homeless people, estimated at 40,000.



Angelina Jolie

Angelina Jolina narrowly escaped a serious “wardrobe malfunction”  at the premiere of
Beowulf when her skin-tight black leather pants started to split at the seams near the hem. Brad Pitt saved the day by hiding the rip with his palm, and holding it up while the actress continued to smile — as poised as ever — at photographers.

Then the poor woman stepped into a wad of gum. Ah, some days,  nothing goes right.



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Winona Ryder & Kate Moss BFF

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Look whose mugs were spotted rummaging the racks at Marc Jacobs in NYC.  Crazypants Kate Moss dearly clutches the confused looking Winona Ryder.  These two Johnny Depp ex-finances were seen skimming the racks at the New York City clothier.

Ryder looks like she’s like to be anywhere other than being around Moss’ arms and Kate looks determined and almost like she’s ready to kick some more ass. 

Watch out, Johnny.  I’m not sure New York is the place for you to be right now.



Kate Hudson Learning to Surf

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Kate Hudson isn’t going to let the break up with Chris Robinson nor the glossy cover news about affairs with the Golden Stallion get her down. 

Hudson was recently spotted in Hawaii trying to get her hang 10 down pat.  The actress is tackling the solo sport of surfing.  To me it looks like she’s got the falling part worked out.

Pictures via PopSugar



Ron Howard.jpgWell, the press have been released from their cages & the word on the street is The Da Vinci Code, the Ron Howard-produced film, sucks.  You know what I’m thinking is the reason?  Tom Hanks’ laughable hairdo, what the hell is he thinking with that recessed mop?

Howard screened his Da Vinci Code for the press at the Cannes film festival Tuesday night.  Critics apparently laughed their way through the full-length feature film, it’s the hair- I promise & received no applause, unless you count the crickets chirping.  Poor Opie.  Check out the review below: 

The Da Vinci Code drew lukewarm praise, shrugs of indifference, some jeering laughter and a few derisive jabs Tuesday from arguably the world’s toughest movie crowd: critics at the Cannes Film Festival. {Yahoo! News}
 
Even at two and a half hours, director Ron Howard’s adaptation feels cursory and rushed….[Tom Hanks] seems to have borrowed Rick Springfield’s haircut, circa “Jessie’s Girl,” and that’s his most distinctive personality trait. As sturdy and versatile an actor as Hanks can be, he can’t work miracles when he’s got nothing to work with. {NYP}
 
Opening the annual Cannes film festival, Ron Howard’s adaptation of the Dan Brown bestseller was described variously as “grim,” “unwieldy” and “plodding.” {Yahoo! News}
 
Ron Howard and screenwriter Akiva Goldsman have conspired to drain any sense of fun out of the melodrama, leaving expectant audiences with an oppressively talky film that isn’t exactly dull, but comes as close to it as one could imagine with such provocative material… {Variety}
 
“The feeling moved quickly from one of great anticipation to one of, shockingly, great boredom…instead of the film building to a white knuckle conclusion, it was the audience fidgeting as Da Vinci passed the two-hour mark and unveiled the first of its half-dozen endings…by the time the big climactic moment of the film finally arrived, the audience burst out laughing, as if this were yet another classic bit of Tom Hanks comedy. As the credits rolled, not a single bit of applause was heard.” {Film Stew}
 
Da Vinci’s over-reliance on exposition drew jeers on several occasions toward the end of the screening and even prompted a few walkouts as it faithfully went through the motions of translating Brown’s elaborate puzzler of a book to the big screen. {E!}

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Bob Geldof Tops Best Celebrity Dad List

Father of the Year Trophy.jpgAnd this year’s best celebrity dad is…..not Tom Cruise apparently, I wonder why.  No, Bob Geldof is top celebrity dad this year.  You may know Irish born Geldof from his punk band Boomtown Rats years, as the lead in Pink Floyd’s The Wall, or by his Live 8 African charity project.

Geldof took the lead from several other big time, mainly British, dad names, taking second place is David Beckham- which just goes to show you that you can cheat on your wife with the nanny and still be the 2nd best celebrity dad.

Here is the Official Top Ten Celebrity Dads List:

Hmmmm…. Best celebrity dad….  I’m going to have to go with Michael Jackson.  He’s just so giving.

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Oh to be Brad Pitt’s Neighbor!

A Hilarious Brad Pitt Photo.jpgBrad Pitt has hired three construction crews for his home in Hollywood Hills in an effort to make sure the renovations are complete before (girlfriend?) Angelina Jolie gives birth to his love child.  The crews will be working around the clock until the job is done meaning that the noise and constant traffic might wear on Pitt’s neighbor’s nerves.

But the sensitive Pitt has already thought of that and is planning a cocktail party when the work is done & he’s settled in.  One neighbor claims the actor insisted that the work to be done after dark should only consist of painting and other quiet jobs to ensure neighborhood happiness. 

Brad has owned the Hills house for over nine years, but had to give it up when he wed Jennifer Aniston, she never liked the place.  Ahhh, that should make Brad pleased- having the baby he’s always wanted & shacking up at his old bachelor pad.

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Bad Ratings Force Miss America to Get Real

Miss America.jpgThe revered, by some anyway, Miss America pageant is set to be morphed into a seven episode reality show.  For the 85-year-old competition, this will be a first and you’ll get to be a part of it. 

Miss America contestants will live together and be a part of the reality TV experience.  Finding Miss America will be a whole new animal than the original pageant.  Not only will we see private interactions, nervous breakdowns and all the crazy preparation, we will be able to cast our vote for our favorite pick.  The show will air next January, so we have lots and lots of time to build up that Miss America anticipation.

Since the pageant only started as a promotional gimmick by a hurting-for-funds Atlantic City hotel owner, I guess we can’t get too upset that the beauty show has taken this realistic turn.

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Jennifer Aniston Hates Me & Reality TV

Jennifer Aniston.jpgJennifer Aniston has given reality TV a cold, hard slap in the face.  The Friends star is blasting reality shows for breeding a culture that is unnaturally obsessed with the lives of the rich & famous.  Well, I guess I could start being obsessed with the lives of the tattered and poor….

Aniston is so aggravated with the situation, she refuses to watch TV these days.  Better for her I suppose, with Angelina & Brad sucking face on camera and possible wedding plans.

 

Aniston backs up her claims & her TV strike by stating, “What happened to a great half-hour sitcom? (Jeez, you tell us!) It’s all Dancing with the Stars, Knitting with the Stars (That’s kinda cute, actually), Building a Home with the Stars, Living in the Home of Stars!  And then the ripping people to shreds.  Humiliation, degradation.  What is going on?  There’s so much instant gratification, and we want it.  It’s just bizarre.”

“I don’t watch TV anymore.  Nothing.  I have no interest in that idol shit.  Unfortunately the world is in such a state with this war and everything else that it’s easier to look at the triteness of celebrity break-us.  It’s like, ‘Ahh, relief.’  It’s an escape, rather like a daytime soap opera.  There’s nothing left to talk about and I’m just sick of everything about myself.”

She’s sick of everything about herself & there’s nothing left to talk about?  What does that even mean?  I think Jen has a bad case of the blues, here’s hoping Vince Vaughn can keep her chin up.

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Celebrating Irish Hunks

This St. Patrick’s Day I thought we would raise our whiskeys to Irish hunks.  Who could think of a better way to celebrate the Emerald Isle?

First off is bad boy Colin Farrell.  This Alexander hunk was born in Dublin May 31, 1976.  Did anyone else think he was a wee older than that?  I guess the drink does that to a man.  Despite his ongoing sex tape lawsuit & rehab stints, this dark-haired dream boat still catches my fancy. 

Notable Quote: ”I love the pints and I love good times and laughter and singing a song and being with people. There’s nothing like it. If I’m not going to enjoy this life, just give it to someone else.”
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Cillian Murphy was born in Cork, Ireland.  He has brightened the screen in such films as Cold Mountain & Girl with a Pearl Earring.  Unfortunately, he’ll always be the creepy & demented Scarecrow from Batman Begins.

Notable Quote: “I am a person who has always needed companionship,” he says. “I’m not very good at being alone. And I should know, I’ve tried it. As for the fame thing, I never intended this to happen and my life, really, hasn’t changed dramatically. But, yes, it does help to have a stable relationship in my life. And no matter what happens I would hope to hold on to the things in life that are most important to me.”

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Ex-boyfriend of Charlize Theron is next on our Irish Hunks list, Stuart Townsend.  With those piercing eyes & Irish sensibility, this star is headed for great things.  Do you ever have those “Ohhhh, that was him?” moments?  I just had one with ole Townsend here, so he was the rock star vampire Lestat in Queen of the Damned.  I can see what Theron saw in this fair skinned young man. 

Notable Quote: “Acting is great. You spend your whole life trying to get it right.”

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Well, you can’t forget your elders.  Pierce Brosnan has drawn us in with his stellar performances as Bond, James Bond.  With his alluring and sexy persona I can see why he was chosen for the acclaimed role.  Too bad it’s all over now.

Notable Quote: “I know most actors say otherwise, but I like sex scenes. Bond was supposed to be this great lover, but I always found the love scenes in those movies a little dull. It’s lovely to work out the fantasy of it all in celluloid and then go home to my wife.”

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Well, the Irish have done us proud with these fine male specimens.  I raise my Bushmills in their general direction.

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Beckham Baffled By Boy’s Befuddeling Blackboard Burden

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England’s famed football (soccer) captain of Real Madrid expresses bewilderment regarding his 6-year-old son Brooklyn’s math homework.  The husband of Spice Girl Victoria Adams, or Posh Spice, admitted to being utterly dumbfounded when his little boy asked for a bit of help with his homework and had to turn to his wife for help.

“Their homework is so hard these days.  I sat down with Brooklyn the other day and I was like, ‘Victoria, maybe you should do the homework tonight.  I think it was math, actually.  It’s done totally different to what I was teached (who said Brits had good grammar?) when I was at school (yeah, math just keeps on changing) and you know, I was like ‘Oh my god, I can’t do this’.  And Brooklyn was like ‘Please do it with me’ and I’m like, ‘I’ll read your book with you.” 

And I’m like, ‘I’m going to vomit’.

The midfielder’s son attends an exclusive school which adheres to the British national curriculum.  Here are a couple of examples of what some British national curriculum math questions for 7-year-olds are:  “Bet went to the shop at 11:45am.  She came back half an hour late.  What time did she come back?” and “What is 12 divided by three?”

David Beckham needs to thank his lucky stars he can play ball, because I don’t think there’s much hope for an intellectual career. 

 

 



‘Idol’ Becky O’Donohue Blazes In Maxim Photos

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American Idol contestant Becky O’Donohue doubles the pleasure. The aspiring singer, (right) and possibly porn star, is featured alongside her twin sister, Jessie, in a series of hot & steamy pics on the Maxim magazine Web site. I’m not so sure about the battered-wife look going for Jessie in the pic above.

The 25-year-old twins posed in bikinis, unbuttoned baseball jerseys that are just waiting for the right person to tear them off and in a sauna setting wrapped in only small towels, glistening with sweat. The photos were taken two years ago for the magazine’s online fantasy (sound like your fantasy as well?) football game. The images come back to us now in our time of need, with O’Donohue an Idol contestant.

Jordan Burchette, executive editor of Maxim Online shares his thoughts regarding the images, “There’s all kind of new buzz surrounding them. They were athletes in college, then models, and now they’re vocalists. We look forward to their political careers.”

I can see that. They run through your mind at work, you imagine them modeling naked just for you, their melodious (yeah, right) singing breezes in your ears and you only want to make them you personal president. Yeah, that’s about right I guess.

But you know what I think? Despite Simon’s reputed hatred for all things breasted, I’m pretty sure he’s the most frequent visitor to this site, along with his teddy bear Rupert and handy bottle of lotion.

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