Need I say more?Â Britney Spears nearly drops baby boy Sean Preston.Â What the hell is this kid going to think when he grows up & sees these pictures?Â Maybe Brit is putting too much baby oil on the poorÂ thing & he’s just a slippery little guy.Â Or maybe she should choose motherhood over fashion and skip heels & wedges all together and try to stay balanced for a change.
If it were not for the mustached man on the right, Britney would have spilled babyÂ Sean all over the New York pavement.Â You know, she doesn’t look thatÂ alarmedÂ or scared.Â Â Crack heads should act like crack heads and rich pop stars should act like rich pop stars- not rich pop stars acting like detached crack heads.Â Â
Maybe she wants DCFS to take Sean Preston away so she can live her red neck life with K-Fed in peace.Â Who knows with thisÂ girl.Â Spears definitely shouldn’t look for a ‘Mother of the Year’ award.Â I will now bury my face in my hands and keep repeating, “There’s no place like home, there’s no place like home.”
Amid reports that Bon Jovi guitarist Richie Sambora &Â ”actress” Denise Richards have split, Richards’ rep has stated that the two are still hot & heavy and that in fact, Denise is flying out to meet him on tour today.
Richards’ representative assured one and all that, “Denise and Richie are still together.”Â Whew, I thought I was going to have to spend the weekend with my head in the sand weeping and begging God to get the two back together.
A source told US WeeklyÂ that Richards will be leaving her children, Sam, 2, and Lola, 11 months, with her parents while she gallivants around Europe with her beau.Â I can’t wait for the pics of Sambora & Richards on the terrace of their hotel- hopefully we’ll get to see another lap dance.Â
Bon JoviÂ will have a short break after their Dublin show allowing the love birds to spend a weekend together inÂ Europe.Â Let’s hope Sambora can get away from all the Bon Jovi groupies to spend time with his #1 groupie.
Sambora wasÂ recently quoted telling fans in Germany that he was “single and ready to party.”
But a close friend of Richie says, “Richie was just being a rock star. His public and private personae are different.Â When you’re a rock star, being carefree is part of the game.”
Could someone please tell me why Bon Jovi is still around?Â Wasn’t ‘Slippery When Wet’ enough already?Â It’s crazy what people will subject themselves to.Â Are Bon Jovi groupies 47-year-old lonely women who fell for his fro & constant sunglasses?Â Jeez.
Posted by Allison as Career Moves, Conscience & Morality Tales, Mischief & Mayhem, Scientology, Tom Cruise- Only a Matter of Time Before He Kills Me at 1:12 PM EDT on May, 17 2006
Tom Cruise has lost.Â What has he lost?Â Well- his dignity, his mind, Nicole Kidman is no longer a Scientologist and Katie, I mean Kate, Holmes looks a little blue these days.Â But Mr. Cruise has also lost his battle to stop a certain episode of South Park from being shown in the UK.
The “Trapped in a Closet” episode mocks Scientology beliefs and shows a cartoony version of Cruise who locks himself in Stan’s closet while under the impression that the born again L. Ron Hubbard sees him as a failure.Â
On Monday the much-fought-over episode was shown at London’s National Film Theatre.Â The show was originally take off the air by British TV network Channel 4 in January due to complaints.
An event planner stated, “If we were charging there may have been legal problems, but it was a free event, so it should be fine.”Â
During the free screening at the theatre, creators Matt Stone & Trey Parker gave a brief talk about free speech and handed out free copies of “Trapped in a Closet”.
I like the way Matt & Trey work it.Â Destroy & humiliate your enemy through open discussion and information, and then pass out the copies in the millions.
Doug tellsÂ Star magazine that momma Jane speaks toÂ Aniston on the phone at least once a week even though it’s been 18 months since the couple split in January 2005.Â I dunno, seems like a hard thing to do to just quit Jennifer cold turkey, there could be major psychological consequences to this action.Â
Doug says, “Brad is not happy about Mom talking to Jennifer.”
“He feels that Mom should move on now, and cut the link that was there. But she is in a difficult position–she has great affection for Jennifer–born out of the fact Brad once loved her and did marry her.”
Brad Pitt swiftly moved on to a new relationship with Angelina Jolie and is now a father to adopted children Maddox & Zahara.Â The wave-making couple are expecting their first biological child together at anytime.Â
I wonder if Jen sent Jane a Mother’s Day card…….
In a hilarious new turn of events, Denise Richards has launched thrown another blow at the estranged husband Charlie Sheen.Â Richards has begun development ofÂ a kids’ clothing line, one month afterÂ Sheen debuted his own collection of kidswear.Â Maybe the new Richards’ line should be called ‘KickAssWear’.
It’s funny isn’t it, the crazy couple are now taking their fight to the shopping malls and boutiques of America where their clothing lines will bitterly compete in the oh so lucrative children’s clothing market.
Bad boyÂ CharlieÂ launched his Sheen Kidz last month, we justÂ love to play around with those letter ‘z’s, whileÂ Denise has announced she is launchingÂ ’Kidtoure’ this summer.Â I think I still like KickAssWear.Â
Kidtoure will feature applique t-shirts for young girls and will be carried by posh little stores like Barney’s New York.Â Charlie & Denise’s children Sam, 2, & Lola, 11 month, have already been spotted sporting their mommy’s tie-dyed collection of t-shirts.Â
Maybe next they will take their battle to the streets, I’m thinking of a clothing line for pimps & sex workers.Â It could be called ‘I Just Might Kill You Wear by Charlie & Denise’.
Posted by Allison as Conscience & Morality Tales at 9:51 AM EDT on May, 15 2006
“I can’t think of a better way to spend my mothers day,” Sarandon told reporters before taking the stage.Â
Code Pink, a women’s anti-war group, organized the 24-hour vigilÂ & anti-war protest.Â Sarandon joined Sheehan onstage at the end of the vigil.Â Susan read aloud two letters addressed to first lady Laura Bush, one she wrote herself and another penned by a woman from Oregon.Â Sarandon also brought a copy of the popular board game ‘Risk’ to be sent to Mrs. Bush along with the letters.Â You know, so she could have something entertaining to do if the letters were pretty boring.Â
Sarandon’s letter urged the first lady to press her husband to personally notify some mothers whose children died while serving in Iraq.
“Those moms praying as they wait for the phone to ring and they hear the voice of their child serving in Iraq,” Sarandon said to a crowd of perhaps 200 people. “Let him be the one to tell them that this week the call will not be coming.”
Leave it to Susan Sarandon to make my Mother’s Day celebrationÂ look pointless & insignificant.
NickÂ Clooney was terrified when his son George Clooney dropped out of college and turned to an acting career.Â The Kentucky native quit college and headed to Los Angeles to give acting a try.Â His first major breakthrough was playing Rosanne Barr’s overbearing boss Booker Brooks on the long-running TV show Rosanne.
But George’s father Nick, newscaster & TV host, admits he feared his son wouldn’t succeed withoutÂ getting his college degree.Â He went so far as to plead & beg with George toÂ go back to school and complete his four-year degree, to be a newsman like him.Â
He recalls, “I thought that was terrible. I wasn’t worried about things like drugs. He knew those dangers. I didn’t want him to be a failure.
“I said, ‘Finish college. There are only 3,000 actors in the United States who make more than $50,000 a year, but there are 50,000 broadcasters making a good living.’
“But he was insistent he didn’t want to be a broadcaster like me. I don’t think it was my idealism that put him off. I think he didn’t want to go into an industry where he would constantly be compared to me.”
Both father & son recently visited the Darfur province trying to boost humanitarian efforts.Â
Dave Chappelle is still struggling to explain to his wife Elaine why he left behind a $50 millon contract from Comedy Central.Â While onÂ Late Night With Conan O’Brien last night, the comedian joked about how he’s still licking the salt off his wounds.Â Â
“My wife is still a little salty with me.Â She’s not mad at me, but don’t think you can walk away from $50 million and your wife is just going to be cool with it.”
Dave Chappelle has repeatedly defended his sudden retreat from his lucrative & popular Chappelle’s Show over the past few months, laughing over the claims that he is “crazy” and seekingÂ psychological help.
Chappelle & O’Brien joked about his swift exodus to Africa where he went immediately following his departure from Comedy Central’s Chappelle’s Show.
“When you go to Africa, especially your first time, you have this overwhelming feeling like you’re home,” he said. “I had a feeling of `man, this feels like home.’
“I think I felt that way because there was a McDonald’s in the airport.”
Posted by Allison as Conscience & Morality Tales, Rumors & Whispers, Scientology, Tom Cruise- Only a Matter of Time Before He Kills Me at 8:55 AM EDT on May, 11 2006
Vaughn praised Aniston by sayingÂ ”Jennifer’s great. She’s one of my favorite people.”
To which Oprah replied, “She’s one of mine, too.”
Vaughn pressed on with,Â ”Jennifer’s great. She’s just really smart and funny and easy to be with – very considerate. She’s great.”
And then Tom Cruise entered stage left and started jumping on couches saying, “Xenu be praised, I love Jennifer too!”
When OprahÂ questioned VinceÂ on the possibility of children he stated,Â ”I think (having children) takes a lot of focus, takes a lot of attention. I think it would be nice at some point to have a different priority. I think that time would come.Â But not any time in the near future for me. No, I have not talked about having kids with Jennifer.”
And chiding reports of their lavish wedding paid for by Oprah, Vince commented, “First we have to have the $8 million wedding.”
If it came down to a mud wrestling match who would win:Â VinceÂ Vaughn, Oprah Winfrey or Tom Cruise?Â I’m going to haveÂ to go with the Oprah,Â ever since The Color Purple, I knew she could pack aÂ punch like nobody’s business.Â
People reports that the former Beverly Hills, 90210 alum tied the marital knot with Canadian actor Dean McDermottÂ on a private island inÂ Fiji yesterday.Â The couple were the only attendees and both wore white and went barefoot, stark contrast with Spelling’s multi-million dollarÂ trip down the isleÂ to Charlie Shanian.
With McDermott’s divorce from Mary Jo EustaceÂ finalized in FebruaryÂ & Spelling’s divorce from Shanian finalized Apr. 20,Â the duo thought it was high time to go the marriage dance again.
Groom McDermott stated his love for Tori saying, “I’ve never had as much of a desire to get married and make a woman my wife as I’ve had with her.Â The feeling is overwhelming. We’re soul mates.”
The newlyweds met on the set ofÂ TV movie Mind Over Murder lastÂ year & got engagedÂ inÂ December.Â Notice the ink was dry on both of their divorces just this year, and they had already proposed.Â That’s an interesting approach.
“We’re so incredibly happy and in love. We cannot wait to start our lives together,” the couple said in a joint statement.
Dean McDermott has permanently expressed his devotion to Spelling through a tattoo on his wrist that readÂ ”Truly, Madly, Deeply, Tori,” while his shoulder features a portrait of the actress.Â How cute.Â So, does the truly, madly go back to the movie with Juliet Stevenson or the Savage Garden song?
Both Tori & DeanÂ haveÂ claimed their respective splits had nothing to do with either spouses, McDermott’s ex-wife MaryÂ Jo EustaceÂ isn’t buying it.Â She is already shopping for a book deal with the possible name of My Husband Left Me for Tori Spelling.Â I’d have to say that it is a fitting title.
In her book proposal, Eustace ridicules her husband of 12 years for leaving her just months after they adopted a baby girl.Â She also reveals that at the time McDemottÂ gotÂ tattoo Tori-fied, he didn’tÂ haveÂ enough money to pay for his electric bill.Â Well, when all else fails- run to DaddyÂ Aaron Spelling for money, right?Â
Wishing the merry newlyweds bliss & betting on a two-year marriage at most.
Posted by Allison as Breakups & Goodbyes, Career Moves, Conscience & Morality Tales, Scientology, Tom Cruise- Only a Matter of Time Before He Kills Me at 9:09 AM EDT on May, 08 2006
Nicole Kidman is stillÂ under the influence of Tom Cruise.Â KidmanÂ tells Ladies HomeÂ Journal,Â issue hitting stands tomorrow,Â that she’s still smitten with the Mission:Â Impossible star.Â The couple officially split in 2000, while Kidman was pregnant and who subsequently had a miscarriage.Â Â
Tom is now engaged to marry Katie, I mean Kate, Holmes & Nicole is engaged to country singer Keith Urban.Â But while Kidman has moved beyond her life with Cruise, she tells the Journal she still has feelings for the Scientologist.
“He was huge; still is. To me, he was just Tom, this lovely man, but to everybody else, he is huge. But he was lovely to me. And I loved him. I still love him.”
Nicole Kidman has always been very quiet & reserved regarding her split with Cruise.Â In one of the most revealing statements she says, “I knew I was going to get hit by something, but I think a divorce, and the demise of what your family is, is a little like a death in itself.”Â
Kidman is very carefulÂ these days who she lets intoÂ herÂ life these days.Â I guess I would be too if I was escaping a Scientology marriage.
She says,Â â€œI surround myself with truthful, kind people, most of whom are not in the business,â€ she says. â€œItâ€™s the life I want to have when Iâ€™m an old woman with long gray hair.â€
Last June former Penthouse Pet Choloe Jones was found dead in her Houston, Texas home.Â Her death occurred just months after going public with aÂ hot & heavyÂ affair she had with Charlie.Â
Jones’ mother Donna is mulling over filing a wrongful death suit against Sheen, thinking he drove her daughter to kill herself.
Donna Jones tells the Globe, “I’ve seen a lawyer about filing a wrongful death suit against Mr. Sheen. I think he didn’t slip her the pills–but he drove her to it with death threats.
“She’d (Chloe) call me 10 times a day telling me of her fears. She was terrified to death of the guy.”
Estranged wife Denise Richards also appears convinced.Â Richards confronted Sheen about Jones’ death when she learned the mother-of-three had died from liver failure after overdoing on prescription drugs.
Richards reveals, “I saw on the news that she had died from undetermined causes. When I asked him if he had anything to do with her death, he said he had ‘no comment’… This scared me.”
Posted by Allison as Career Moves, Conscience & Morality Tales, Mischief & Mayhem, Rumors & Whispers, Scientology, Tom Cruise- Only a Matter of Time Before He Kills Me, Top Ten Lists at 9:01 AM EDT on May, 05 2006
So we were all waiting on sharp pins & needles for the mysterious Britney Spears press conference yesterday.Â But it looks like we’ve all been bamboozeled, the pop star diva never showed and we are now left to guess why.
Top Ten Reasons Why Britney Spears Did Not Show Up For Thursday’s Press Conference:
Someone has finally come out of the Mission:Â Impossible 3Â woodwork and defended Tom Cruise’s on-set behavior.Â Michelle Monaghan states the actor never promoted Scientology on the set and insists he never tried to convert her.
NewÂ daddy Cruise has facedÂ criticism worldwide for his staunch beliefs andÂ recentlyÂ received a backlash due to his non-certified ultrasound machine use.Â There have beenÂ rumors & speculationsÂ that Tom tries to convert everyone he knows to Scientology, and specifically on theÂ movie set.Â
But Mission:Â Impossible 3 co-star Michelle Monaghan insists that Tom Cruise’sÂ zany beliefsÂ do not playÂ into his professional life.
She says, â€œHe didn’t give me any Scientology advice and I never got any Scientology questions from him either.
“Should I hand him out books on Catholicism? I don’t know.
“I enjoyed every single minute of working with him. He’s such a complete professional and he couldn’t have been a more patient guy.
“On top of that, he’s such a generous guy. I’ve never seen any actor I’ve worked with treat the cast and crew the way he did. He’s incredible.”
You know what I’m left thinking?Â How much did it take the Church of Scientology to pay Monaghan off?
Britney SpearsÂ is holding aÂ press conference at the Los Angeles Convention Center today.Â It’s almost been a millennium since she held her last conference, so this is kinda big, likeÂ her new look, big.Â Anyone else miss the old Brit?Â The attractive one with a convincing smile, not the one we see today trying to smile throughÂ the K-Fed marriage & dropped babies.
What is this press conference going to be about, Britney?Â I’m thinking she either captured Osama bin Laden withÂ her teeth in the woods; or sheÂ has converted to Scientology; or she’sÂ finally coming to her senses and leaving her red neck husband Kevin Federline; or she’s going to reveal what everyone and their brother already know- she’s pregnant yet again, and a baby girl is on the way.Â
Britney has yet to reveal why she has invited select media,Â journalist and record industry reps to the convention center, butÂ one question seems to tap at my brain-Â will K-Fed be a part of this special Spears talk?Â With his new record on the loose, will he try & upstage his wife for musical attention?
“K-Fed’s the bomb now,” says a friend of the couple. “He’s the one who’s cut a record and performed in public most recentlyâ€”and who doesn’t look totally gross in sweat pants. Britney’s got to do something other than drive around with her baby on her lap to get attention. I guess this ‘mysterious’ press conference is it.”
News has circulated that there may be marital problems between Britney Spears & Kevin Federline.Â Reports of K-Fed’s marijuana use, compulsive spending andÂ his practice of a hands-off theory of parenting have culminated to an unhappy marital affair.
“She can’t stand the thought of playing second banana to a guy who used to carry her [sanitary napkin] bag,” said the friend. “But whether she’s leaving Hollywood, quitting show business, or running for governor, all eyes are going to be on K-Fed if he shows up today.”
To tell you the truth, I’m hoping for the Laden in her teeth scenario.
Simple Life starÂ Nicole Richie has made peace with her weight loss and gas faced up to the fact that the ‘I’m just naturally thin’ line isn’t fooling anyone.Â Â Richie opens up to Vanity Fair saying that she is afraid that young women who see her as a role model would aim to have her sleek, blowing-away-in-the-wind figure.
Richie reveals, “I know I’m too thin right now, so I wouldn’t want any young girl looking at me and saying, ‘That’s what I want to look like.’”
The socialite actress pleads that her weight loss is not due to an eating disorder and that she has sought medical advice.Â Richie states, “I started seeing a nutritionist and a doctor… I do recognize that I have a problem, and I want to be responsible and fix it, and I’m on that path right now.”
But the docs aren’t convincedÂ Richie’s weight loss isn’t due to anorexia.Â Â In an upcoming Vanity Fair article one of her medics, Jeffery Wilkins, informs us, “If it’s not anorexia, she should be able to gain the weight. If it ends up being anorexia we can help her with that.”
So, either way it looks like Nicole Richie is on the right track to avoid having a string attached to her legs and being flown like a kite.Â Now if she can only find a way to mend that broken Paris Hilton relationship…Â
It’s like a party girl sandwich with a Greek in the middle.Â Paris Hilton, Stavros Niarchos & teen queen Lindsay Lohan have been quite the busy bees.Â Paris, who stole Stavros from Mary Kate Olsen, recently broke up with the shipping heir.Â Now it’s being reported that teen queen Lohan has stolen Niarchos from the open bachelor market.Â Who is this guy, Adonis reincarnate?
According to Life & Style just hours after Hilton let loose of Niarchos, Lindsay Lohan had a handful of theÂ Greek hotpants.Â Niarchos was seen â€œsipping cocktails and dirty dancingâ€ with Lohan at LA club Element.Â Â
A bartender told the mag, “Lindsay was all over Stavros.Â At one point, he had his hand up her skirt!â€Â Â Three days later, Stavros was spotted leaving Lohanâ€™s room at the Chateau Marmont.Â I’m sure he was just dropping by to say hello and making sure she had enough “fruit” in her “fruit basket”.Â Maybe she didn’t have enough Greek “olives” in her “fruit basket”.Â
Going back to the hotel heiress Paris Hilton, there are conflicting reports as to the motivation behind her breakup with Stavros.Â Hollywood.com reports that Hilton ditched NiarchosÂ because he wanted to spend the summer living it up on his yacht, while Paris plans to promote her upcoming album.Â Yes, I said it.Â Her damn upcoming album.Â God save us.
Paris dumped Adonis right before she left for Austria this past Thursday where she made a short appearance at a music festival for a whopping fee of $1 million.Â
A source tells Us Weekly, “Paris dumped him. He wanted Paris to spend the summer on his yacht, but she doesn’t want to party with kids on a boat. She’s going to promote her album.”
But hey, Paris is a bouncer, a get-back-on-that-horse-and-ride kinda gal and it looks like she’s doing just jim doodley.Â Hilton was back in states Monday, where she met first-round draft pick football player Matt Leinart for lunch in LA
According to a source, “There’s an attraction, but they haven’t hooked up.”Â Well, jeepers, she just jumped out of bed with Stavros, maybe she can handle being single for at least a week.
What a tasty sandwich that Paris-Stavros-Lohan sandwichÂ is.Â Â You know, to make things balanced, should maybe Paris & Mary Kate hook up?Â Â I can just see the videoÂ now.
And the Anna Nicole Smith legal battle marches on. Yesterday the U.S. Supreme Court awarded Anna Nicole Smith the right to continue her legal battle in pursuit of her late husband J. Howard Marshall’s fortune.
As previously reported, the former Playboy playmate Smith married oil tycoon Marshall II, 89, in 1994 while she was a 26-year-old topless dancer in Texas. Marshall died the following year of their marriage and Smith contended that she was promised half his fortune, valued at $1.6 Billion. During their short marriage Marshall showered Smith with $6.6 million in gifts that included two homes, $2.8 million in jewelry & $700,000 in clothes.
Pierce Marshall, J. Howard Marshall’s son & Anna Nicole’s stepson, though I doubt they have mother & son talks, disputes Smith’s claims that J. Howard intended to give her half his estate & insists that the $6.6 million worth of gifts she received during the 14-month marriage was all she was entitled to.
However, Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg (that’s a mouthful) has determined that the recent appeals court ruling, which entitled Smith to nothing, was wrong. And now mother & stepson will engage in all out war. Can’t we just decide this via mud wrestle?
Pierce Marshall made his voice heard with a warning to Anna Nicole Smith & legal team, “(I’ll) continue to fight to clear my name in California federal court. That is a promise that (Smith) and her lawyers can take to the bank.”
And I bet they will. I bet they will.
It looks like hot couple Angelina Pitt & Brad Jolie, I mean Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt will again hit movie screen together.Â The Mr. & Mrs. Smith duo have recently been linked to the much-talked-about-but-never-actually-goes-into-filming movie based on Ayn Rand’s famous novel Atlas Shrugged.
Lionsgate FilmsÂ purchased theÂ rights to the film version of the 1957 novel, which is considered to be one of the most influential books of modern history.Â I dunno, I’d pay good money to see gambler & fellow Russian writer Fyodor Dostoevsky take on Rand in the literary ring.
Here’s anÂ excerpt from Atlas Shrugged that describes Dagny in alluring detail, is this the perfect role for Jolie?
“He saw a girl standing on top of a pile of machinery on a flatcar.
She was looking off at the ravine, her head lifted, strands of
disordered hair stirring in the wind. Her plain gray suit was like a
thin coating of metal over a slender body against the spread of sun-
flooded space and sky. Her posture had the lightness and unself-
conscious precision of an arrogantly pure self-confidence. She was
watching the work, her glance intent and purposeful, the glance of
competence enjoying its own function. She looked as if this were
her place, her moment and her world, she looked as if enjoyment
were her natural state, her face was the living form of an active,
living intelligence, a young girl’s face with a woman’s mouth, she
seemed unaware of her body except as of a taut instrument ready to
serve her purpose in any manner she wished.”
You know, the more I read it the more convinced I am that I am the one to play this part!Â Get Lionsgate on the phone, Jeeves!
The story revolves around theÂ futuristicÂ economic collapse of theÂ US and illustrates Rand’s philosophy of objectivism.
Producers Howard and Karen Baldwin will adapt theÂ 560,938-word novel into a feature film, a task I do not envy.Â
Over the many years Clint Eastwood, Robert RedfordÂ & Faye Dunaway have had ties to the project.Â It’s just another Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.Â We’ll probably be lucky if we see it in our lifetime.