I've been struggling today. Everywhere I go it is Tiger Woods this or Tiger Woods that. I've been calling all my sources and all they want to do is talk about Tiger and I refuse to do that today. Instead I figured I would take you through a stroll down memory lane of the women I took out to brunch in the past. Why brunch you ask? Because it makes you look sophisticated and there is no obligation to do something with them after if you don't want to. Plus, if you decide to pull the trigger and take them home then you still have most of the day left when you are done.

Here we have Ali Larter. She used to be cool and sexy and I'm not sure what happened to her. She wore the whip cream bikini in Varsity Blues like a champ, but now, she doesn't seem to have that sizzle anymore. We went to brunch way back in '96 and all she wanted to do was eat salmon. I have never seen someone request so much salmon in my life. It was actually kind of scary.

I figured she knew a secret about salmon that I didn't, like it was good for your brain or helped you breathe longer underwater in case you were being waterboarded, but nope, she just likes to eat salmon. I'm not sure this has anything to do with how she looks in this picture, but if she got off the salmon she needs to get back on it and if she is still on it she needs to get off of it.

Eat some hotdogs or something.