You know, most people get a DUI, then get into a load of trouble & paperwork.  Most people get a DUI & get caught driving on a suspended license, you probably don’t hear from them for a damn while.

But if Paris Hilton gets caught driving her luxury car on a suspended license, she calls on her fans & California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger to help her attain a get-out-of-jail-free card or something.

Hilton, in a last-ditch attempt to keep her skinny ass out of jail, is endorsing an online petition anyone & everyone can sign.   Paris has teamed up with her pal/fan Joshua to aid her in this so-sad attempt at grasping at straws.

On her MySpace page, Hilton posts, “My friend Joshua started this petition. Please help and sign it. I love you all!”

The petition is addressed to Gov. Schwarzenegger & claims  that “the American public who support Paris are shocked, dismayed and appalled by how Paris has been the person to be used as an example that drunk driving is wrong.

“She provides hope for young people all over the US and the world. She provides beauty and excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives.

“If the late former President Gerald Ford could find it in his heart to pardon the late former President Richard Nixon after his mistake(s), we undeniably support Paris Hilton being pardoned for her honest mistake as well.”

Well, at least it’s ballsy or something.  ‘Hope to young people all over the US and the world’?  WTF?  Yeah, like hope to see what a mess Paris’ life is & steer right around that train wreck!

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